You Know You Want Me
by rebelrsr
Summary: Under the influence of Red K, Kara shares some surprising facts with Alex.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Please note that there are definite Dub/Con and Non/Con elements at points of this fic.

A cool breeze blew through the broken windows, rustling the curtains. Kara enjoyed the way Alex's skin goose pebbled in response. "You're so beautiful like this." Naked and spread deliciously across the bed.

"Kara," Alex's voice broke. The chains holding her cuffed hands to the headboard rattled as she yanked desperately. "Don't do this. It isn't you!"

"Oh, but it is, Alex." Reaching for the recessed zipper on her tunic, she peeled it down. "This is _so_ me. The me I've never been allowed to be." The tunic opened. Kara allowed it to hang from her shoulders. Watched Alex's gaze zero in on her unbound breasts before skittering away.

Yanking at the chains again, Alex thrashed on the bed. Kara was glad she'd decided to use well-padded cuffs or Alex might have damaged her wrists. "Damn it, Kara! Stop this!" Panic and fear laced the demand. Alex's heart beat a frantic rhythm that turned Kara's smile into a smirk.

Kara shrugged out of her tunic and removed her boots and pants. "You don't mean that, Alex." She climbed onto the bed. "You've wanted this as much as I have. Did you think I missed all the times you looked at me? The way you stared? Even when we were kids." One slow inch at a time, Kara crawled up Alex's body.

A flush descended from Alex' hairline, down her body, keeping time with Kara's upward progress.

"You're my sister!" Kara had known the objection would come. Alex was nothing if not predictable when it came to their relationship. Kara blamed Eliza for turning Alex into a woman tortured by guilt and responsibility. A woman who denied her deepest desires and locked her emotions into tiny, inaccessible boxes.

Rather than refute the specious claim, Kara bent her head. Alex's skin tasted of sweat, the cheap detergent used by the DEO laundry, and a spice that was pure Alex. Need threatened to derail Kara's plan to pull Alex into a maelstrom of want and desire. To bend her to Kara's will until she admitted what they'd both known for over a decade: Alex belonged to Kara.

Kara fought back the fog of lust. She had to be in control. Alex _needed_ her to be in control. "Look at you, baby. You're beautiful." Muscles taut from fighting her bonds, Alex was a work of art. Each panting breath pushed her breasts up, only to fall with a bounce that drew Kara's gaze to peaked nipples. Kara wanted to taste those buds. Bite them until Alex balanced on the edge of pleasure and pain. Until she begged Kara to stop…not stop…to bite harder.

"Please. Please, Kara." Alex's plea was part sob this time. The anger was gone. Kara recognized Alex's real fear. "This isn't you! You've been drugged. Please! Don't do something you'll regret."

It was enough to pull Kara back from the edge. She stopped crawling, legs straddling Alex's calves. "Shh, baby! I won't harm you." Hurt was another matter entirely. Alex was a warrior. Warriors lived for adrenaline and pain. Kara would dole out both equally. "Trust that I want you, Alex. Trust that I love you, that I _have_ loved you, that I am in love with you. I will worship you in the light of Rao, caring for you as He does all his children."

Alex melted at Kara's vow. The relaxation in the muscles under Kara was fleeting – yet it was there.

Keeping her voice gentle, Kara bent again. "I am not your sister, Alex. I have _never_ been your sister. That is a lie your parents and my cousin created when he abandoned me in Midvale." She dragged her tongue over the same path as before, trailing the tip from Alex's navel to the soft, smooth skin between Alex's breasts.

When Alex writhed this time, she moved _into_ Kara rather than away.

"That's right, baby. It's OK to let go." Nails moving in counterpoint to her tongue, Kara dragged the blunt tips from wrists to the sensitive flesh under her arms. Alex's shout of outrage was mixed with uncomfortable laughter as the burn of the welts Kara left merged with a fiendish tickling sensation.

"No…" Alex's eyes closed. Her head rocked back and forth in denial. Tears leaked out to drip into the shorter strands of hair at her temples.

Dark pleasure filled Kara as she watched Alex's body fight with her mind. "Alex, _yes_!" Lifting her hips, she drove the fingers of her right hand through the folds of Alex's labia. Wet. So wet. She didn't linger or tease. It wasn't time for that. Instead, Kara pulled her hand back and pressed the digits against Alex's lips. "Taste how much you want me."

Alex had always been stubborn. Her chin turned defiantly away, and her mouth remained closed. Kara sighed before painting Alex's arousal on tight-pressed lips.

"I remember the minute I knew you were mine. The day you fought that first battle for me." Kara nibbled at Alex's pounding pulse point. "You were magnificent. I sketched you that night, eyes blazing and dressed in the uniform of the Military Guild. You had no family crest, so I honored you with mine. You'd have ruled the Military, baby. General Alex Zor-El."

She got lost in the feel and taste of Alex. Trails of saliva danced with darkened bruises left by lips and teeth.

"Let me love you, Alex. Join with me." Kara had never intended to ask for Alex's agreement. When Alex had come to her, demanding Kara go to the DEO to be "cured", she'd had only conquest in mind. She'd take Alex by force until Alex had no choice except submission.

The need to _take_ remained, but the image of that simple pencil sketch fanned the flames of another desire: for Alex to look at Kara with the easy affection, the _love,_ that had drawn Kara to Alex from the beginning.

Reaching up, she unbuckled the cuffs on Alex's wrists then turned her head and used her laser vision to carefully burn the matching cuffs from Alex's ankles.

Alex immediately sat up, sliding almost free from Kara. "Kar?"

"I won't…" Kara balled her fists in frustration and the anticipation of losing her heart. "I _can't_ force you."

To her surprise, Alex didn't lash out. She didn't complete her getaway. "Of course, you won't force me." Alex touched a finger to Kara's cheek. "That isn't who you are. You're Kara Zor-El. Supergirl. A hero."

A hero. Kara snarled at the hated phrase. She'd donned her cape to save Alex and now everyone expected her to be a beacon of hope and compassion. To save cats and snakes from trees and assemble cheap furniture for people too stupid to read the directions. Those expectations pushed her to hide who she was and who she loved. Kara would burn the hated suit if it wouldn't mean turning Alex's respect and devotion to disappointment.

"Kara!" Alex said with more force.

Enough force for Kara to look up.

"Did you mean it?" Alex asked.

Kara nodded. "I'll never harm you, Alex." She dared to close the gap between them. To press her lips roughly against Alex's, needing to know how they felt. She tasted the musk of Alex's desire and a hint of the spearmint gum Alex preferred.

Strong hands gripped her shoulders, pushing her away.

Alex tore Kara's heart from her chest in the process. "Kara." Kara had never imagined she'd hate hearing Alex say her name.

Kara rolled from the bed. She couldn't stay here now. She redressed in a flash, eyes burning with tears she wouldn't shed and the molten heat she'd unleash on the agents the DEO would no doubt sent to attempt to capture her.

She'd make them all pay. Shoving down the pain of Alex' rejection, Kara let rage suffuse her. They'd see that Supergirl was a construct, a hollow shell of human hopes and dreams that no longer existed.

"Kara, wait!" Alex grabbed Kara's arm. "Don't go."

"Why? So you can convince me to turn myself in?" Kara kept her back to Alex. She couldn't bear to see Alex like…that, a fantasy Kara had managed to hold and touch, if only for an instant.

Like the general Kara had named her, Alex moved between Kara and the broken window. Shoulders back. Chin up. Eyes blazing. "You tie me up, tell me all kinds of…of th-things, and then run away when you don't get what you want?"

"You have no idea what I want!" Kara shouted.

"Isn't that what you've been trying to tell me tonight?" Alex moved into Kara's personal bubble, one bony finger poking pointlessly into Kara's chest. "I'm pretty sure I remember you saying you loved me. That you…" Alex face turned so bright red Kara could see it even in the moonlit apartment. "That you wanted me," Alex finished in an embarrassed whisper.

Kara refused to respond.

Alex's shoulders drooped, and she stepped back.

It wasn't like Alex to give up so easily. Still, it cleared the path for Kara to leave. She flexed her knees in preparation for takeoff.

"Hey, J'onn. I've got Kara." It was such an exaggerated description of their circumstances that it held Kara in place. She observed Alex as she talked on the cell phone she must have retrieved on her way through the apartment.

When Alex noticed Kara's attention, she met Kara's gaze steadily. "No. Don't send anyone. I've got it under control. If I think Kara needs time in the beds or a once-over, we'll come to the base in the morning. Thanks. Yeah. Bye." Still holding Kara's stare, Alex tossed the phone onto the nearby couch.

"Alex? What…What are you doing?" Kara watched in confusion as Alex held out a hand.

When she didn't take the offering, Alex wiggled her fingers impatiently. "Come on. We need to talk – without the chains this time."

Legs stiff and uncooperative, Kara moved closer. Took the hand. The warm, _willing_ hand. A hand that pulled her back to the bedroom, where Alex sat against the headboard.

"I…" Alex swallowed. "I really suck at talking, you know. And emotions." Her voice was small. No longer brash and confident. "Could you maybe come here instead of standing there?"

Kara nodded. She could definitely do that. Except, Alex was still naked. She hadn't made any attempt to redress after calling J'onn. Was that an invitation? Unsure, Kara once again reached for the zipper on her tunic.

There were no screams of outrage or demands that Kara keep her clothes on.

Devoid of her uniform, Kara climbed onto the bed. She sat cross-legged at the end.

"No, Kar." Alex cleared her throat and ran a hand through her hair. Tells Kara recognized. Alex was nervous. Uncomfortable. "Closer. Please."

Surely Alex didn't mean…

"This close?" Kara scooted up the bed until she rested against Alex's left thigh.

Alex shook her head. "No. Um…closer. Like…like before."

Alert for any sign of distress, Kara threw her left leg over Alex.

"Yeah. That's…" Had Alex's voice deepened? "That's perfect."

Kara wasn't sure about Alex's voice, but her heart rate had quickened. Kara's picked up speed to match. _Rao, please_ , she prayed silently.

Perhaps Rao listened. Alex reached out and stroked Kara's stomach, a tiny grin peeking out when Kara sucked in a breath and shuddered. "You really meant it, didn't you?" she asked. "You…you want me."

"More than my next breath," Kara answered immediately. "More than seeing Krypton whole and prospering outside my dreams."

Alex chewed on her lip for a long minute. "I thought you were lying." She rushed on before Kara could object. "I thought it was the Red K. That it was making you say things you didn't mean."

"You know better, Alex." Sensing that hope wasn't lost, Kara leaned down until her lips were millimeters from Alex's. "You're a scientist. You came here with a cure in your pocket. You knew _exactly_ what the Red K did to me."

"I did," Alex whispered.

"Every word was the truth. A truth I've been afraid to speak until now." Until a new form of Kryptonite had helped Kara verbalize all the words locked inside. "I love you, not like a sibling or a friend. I love you, Alex Danvers. Were Krypton still alive, I would stand before the Council and declare my love for you in front of my family and Rao himself."

It was unclear who moved. Whether Alex lifted her head or Kara bent further. Their lips met, Alex's opening to Kara's tongue. This kiss was tentative at first. Alex was stiff and unsure. Kara, afraid to believe, to hope.

Kara finally drew back. Wiped one hand across wet lips. "Say it, Alex."

"I love you, too." The words were soft yet landed with the force of Kara's pod landing on Earth. "So much." There were more tears in Alex's eyes. Kara tenderly brushed them away. "I told Mom."

"What!" Kara couldn't believe it.

Alex laughed brokenly. "Yeah. I was still in high school. After I blurted it out, I thought Mom didn't understand what I meant. She just…she said of course I loved you. You were my sister. I didn't know how to explain I loved you another way."

Another load of guilt Alex had borne. " _I_ understand, baby."

"Make me yours, Kara." Leaning up, Alex nipped Kara's neck. "God, I can't believe I owe all this to Maxwell Lord, but… Please, Kara. Do all those things you talked about before."

"My brave general." Kara didn't try to use the cuffs still fastened to the headboard. She crawled backward a few inches, dragging Alex prone. She wrapped each of Alex's wrists in her hands, pinning them to the mattress. "My heart is yours. My body is yours. My House and all its privileges are yours."

Of course, Alex tested Kara's hold. She pulled fruitlessly against Kara's grip. Her expression was sly, and she had the gall to wink as she tried to gain her freedom. "Sounding a little soft there, Supergirl. I don't remember you pledging yourself to me before."

It took Kara a minute to understand. When she did, she laughed. "You're mine, General. Fight all you want, but you'll fall before me. You are _mine_ , Alex Zor-El. I claim you in the Light of Rao for eternity."

Alex's cry of shocked pain and desire echoed through the apartment and out the shattered window when Kara sank her teeth into the creamy flesh of Alex's breast.

They'd work on finding a more traditional marriage bracelet in the morning.


	2. Fearless

"You and Alex still fighting?" Winn appeared at Kara's side, munching on a doughnut. He offered the rest of the box.

Kara took the box but didn't open it. Her stomach was too knotted for food, even if they were her favorite powdered sugar doughnuts. "We're not fighting." Fighting involved some kind of talking or physical confrontation.

The only time she and Alex communicated was during Supergirl emergencies. Kara hadn't been within punching distance since the Red K incident. Since she'd woken up with Alex naked in her arms and her teeth marks already bruising Alex's breast.

" _Good morning." Alex's voice squeaked with lingering sleep; her eyes blinked a few times before settling on Kara. They were different. Softer than Kara had ever seen them._

 _At first, Kara didn't understand what that meant. Her memory rushed back, though, as Alex leaned in and kissed her. Really kissed her. Lips and tongue and hands pulling Kara on top of Alex. "You look better. No more Red K, probably."_

 _Red K. Better._

 _Kissing Alex._

 _Holy Rao! Kissing Alex! Kara scrambled from the bed! She'd nearly raped Alex. She'd…she'd… Shame twisted her stomach. Kara swallowed, bile burning her throat, as she spotted the shackles still attached to the bed._

 _She dressed in seconds using Superspeed and rushed out the door with Alex's confused, hurt voice ringing in her ears._

A sugar-covered finger pointed at the unopened box in Kara's hands. "You aren't eating," Winn poked Kara's arm. "You. _You_ aren't eating." As if Kara had forgotten how to speak English, he repeated. "You _aren't eating_. I've never seen you not eat. On top of that, you haven't hugged Alex once. Supergirl isn't supposed to know Agent Danvers outside of the DEO – but you hug her every single time you come here. Until now."

The Command Center blurred as Kara blinked back sudden tears. She missed Alex. So much. They'd never been this…disconnected since Kara's first days on Earth. But what she'd done couldn't be repaired with an "I'm sorry" and a hug. Kara had no idea how to fix the damage she'd done to their relationship. All because the Red K had opened the box on Kara's horrible secret.

Alex was never supposed to know about Kara's feelings. The inappropriate ones. The ones she'd learned were considered sick and "perverted" in Midvale when one of Alex's friends had seen Kara sketching General Alex Zor-El and put two and two together.

" _I knew you were weird, Danvers," Vicky mocked. She'd tried to grab Kara's notebook but lost out to Kara's inhuman speed. She contented herself with gagging sounds. "Pervert! Who knew you wanted to bang your sister? You're sick. They ought to lock you up where you can't infect the rest of us."_

Kara had ripped up that first drawing and run all the way back to the Danvers' home alone. Alex had assumed she'd been crying over Krypton and had held Kara for hours. From then on, Kara only sketched Alex in the privacy of their shared room – and then only when Alex was out with her friends and the threat of discovery was minimal. She'd stuffed anything more than sisterly affection under layers of denial and sworn to never let Alex know.

For weeks, she'd lived in fear that _Vicky_ would tell Alex out of spite. She hadn't, though, and Kara had managed to pretend and lie. Until the Red K.

Alex knew all of her shameful secrets now. Kara couldn't even be in the same room with Alex without replaying the scene in her bedroom. Some of her self-hatred leaked into her voice, making her response sharp and angry. "I don't always hug her. J'onn gets mad when I forget; I hate his lectures on how I need to protect my identity."

Winn yanked the box from Kara's hands and moved to block her view of Alex. Not that it mattered since Alex had stalked out of the room minutes earlier. "Whatever happened, you know Alex will forgive you. I mean, she'd kill any one of the rest of us for forgetting to dot an 'i' in an incident report. I always have Vasquez proofread mine to be safe because your sister knows a thousand ways to kill me with a single finger."

"You're exaggerating," Kara pointed out. She started to say more when the ambient chatter in the Command Center stopped. The silence was so out of place that Kara floated a few inches and peered over Winn's head.

Alex stared back at her.

Alex, dressed in the tight leather duty uniform of the House of El's personal army. Nth-metal collar tabs marked her as a general, and the raised House Crest – the same one covering Kara's chest – sat over Alex's left breast.

Kara dropped to the ground with a thud. Her boots continued to sound against the concrete as she marched into the Command Center. Into Alex's personal space. "What in Rao's name are you doing?" she spat in a piercing whisper.

"Doing what you're too afraid to do, Lady El." Fearless as always, Alex met Kara's anger. Of course, she did. Turning on her heel, Alex walked away, daring Kara to follow her.


End file.
